The hustler of nonsense

Everybody is a would be hustler these days…

Here is a classic example of someone from the world of media, automatically…

(Editor’s note: or maybe even arrogantly?)

Expecting we will be over the moon (really..?!) to allow them to add us to some sort of hustle they have dreamed up, for middle of the road places to get themselves featured in the Chronicle…


The pitch & a portal to another world…

Original Message – From: Jack Huf – To : WHQ : Subject : WHQ in the Evening Chronicle

Hi there, Congratulations!

The events for The World Headquarters have been added to the Evening Chronicle which is part of the Line-Up network.

Claim your venue listing now to see all of your events that we’ve added:

We power what’s on for a rapidly expanding group of media companies including Trinity Mirror, Bauer Radio, Archant and dmg media – some of the largest publishers in the UK.

Our unique technology automatically collects events from your website and puts them in front of millions of people.

Your events will also appear on the Line-Up app – featured as ‘Best New App’ by Apple – a What’s On guide that’s personal to you, which is adding thousands of users across the UK each month.

Join hundreds of other venues and claim your venue now to: Ensure your events continue to be added to Line-Up, view all of your events that have been added, gain editorial access to your events and profile & gain access to analytics and insights (see how many views your events are getting).

(Editor’s note: Cue further pointless analysis…)

(Reader’s Voice: Cut…!!! We are now officially awarding WHQ an extra point, to acknowledge the deft skills involved, in including a reference ‘Pine Barrens,’ the greatest ever episode of the Sopranos, within your rollover – These are exceptional skills you are displaying here. Our minds are made up now….

We shall definitely be reading the entire site – You can continue now…) 

.Claiming your venue is completely free, just reply to this e mail. If you have any questions please let me know.

All the best, Jack Huf Co-founder, Line-Up


The Answer is no

Original Message – From: WHQ – To : Jack Huf : Subject : WHQ in the Evening Chronicle

Hi Jack,

We are an Underground Club & we promote via our own website & word of mouth. As such we have no interest in this whatsoever & would appreciate it if you could remove any reference to World HQ from your hustle.

Best wishes, WHQ.


Original Message – From: Jack Huf – To : WHQ : Subject : WHQ in the Evening Chronicle

No problem, we will remove you & your events from the network. Best Jack.


& Here’s the reason why…

Here at WHQ we publicise our Club by making it good, keeping it good & relying on people thinking it’s so good, that they tell their friends about it.

This way our friendly little gang expands & grows. Organically, realistically & with sustainability.

Without us ever having to focus our attention on daft hustlers, or on anyone else but you, your chums & all the other people who come & party with us.

We don’t need, welcome, yearn for, or expect the media to support us.  We certainly don’t want anyone to try to suck us into daft hustles they have devised, which whilst packaged as trying to do us a favour, are simply people trying to use us & end up detracting from what we are about.

We don’t have to be like other places & we don’t have to market what we do via any mediums beyond our dancefloor & our website. So if you are considering dreaming up a media hustle which you plan to roll out via e mails with the word ‘Congratulations’ as the opening gambit..?

You are wasting your time with us, as the only favour we want from you is to please leave us in peace.